How to Win Friends and Influence Catholics

The preaching in the Cleveland, Ohio Roman Catholic Diocese must be getting pretty bad – even by Catholic standards! Therefore the diocese is encouraging "All active priests, deacons, and certified pastoral ministers" to attend Dale Carnegie public speaking workshops this November and next February. This was reported in the November, 2005 Diocesan Memorandum.

Because Roman priests have never received Christ by faith ALONE, they are unable to preach in the power of the Holy Spirit. Besides, God does not bless sermons......excuse me, homilies based on papal encyclicals, or those endless exhortations urging the 'faithful' to be more like "Our Lady."

One Carnegie brochure boasted:

"You'll be on your feet and presenting before you know it. In no time you'll be using sophisticated techniques like voice modulation, attention focusing, and idea pyramids to greatly impact and persuade your audience."

Comment – These are fleshly techniques that will only get fleshly results.

Another brochure said these workshops will teach:

"How to handle a formal speech, impromptu remarks, or a contentious press conference."

Comment – "A contentious press conference." I'll bet there are a few Catholic bishops who wish this workshop had been out BEFORE all the sex abuse lawsuits hit!

A joke here......a gesture there......But even after these workshops, these priestly homilies will still remain as dead as ever! May the Spirit of God show Catholics that the preaching they hear is worthless for a reason – because Christ is NOT in churches where wafers are worshipped.